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They flee from me that sometime did me seek With naked foot, stalking in my chamber. I have seen them gentle, tame, and meek, That now are wild and do not remember That sometime they put themself in danger To take bread at my hand; and now they range, Busily seeking with a continual change. Sir Thomas Wyatt  Throughout his life, my dear father had been an angry man. As a child I never knew why.  I never understood, why so angry. I spent many long hours with him in total happiness, too. Later in my life and towards the end of his life, I  would question to myself who or what was it that had made my father so angry, that he carried  this always with him throughout his life.  I never did find out. I never made it my purpose to find out either. I accepted his anger. I resigned myself to the fact that my father had a right to be angry. He was a principled man, he meant no harm to the world. The world had wronged him in someway. " Never live ha...

The Right to be forgotten did not apply to me  The open free web did not apply to me The employability of computer science graduates did not apply to me Fear and destruction  applied to me.  When you are old and grey and full of sleep, And nodding by the fire, take down this book, And slowly read, and dream of the soft look Your eyes had once, and of their shadows deep;                                                         W.B Yeats 

A private life. A public life. The unfinished Greek tragedy; hubris nemesis catharsis Enter stage left: The Believers, The Fools, The Hypocrites, The Sycophants Enter stage right: His Majesty, the King. The Protector, to royal fanfare. The celebrated performance speech of His Majesty, the annual address to banish the naysayers. "I am delighted and most proud to protect and defend our great realm. This sceptred isle. To protect you all, all my most dearest and loyal flock" An audience member arose, weak and timidly she spoke. Her voice trembled with fear. "Every person's unrivalled privacy protected ? For My most private Data exchanged had been deleted (as believed and trusted), but instead it was taken (purposely), encrypted (allegedly), stored (without my consent) and discovered (to my total detriment) and shared by and with others. All without my control or my consent. and then My Identity, of once great self worth, and dignity, revealed, given a...

“When the image is new, the world is new.”   ―  Gaston Bachelard ,  The Poetics of Space The digital image lasts forever, the oil painting will  not last forever. Millions and millions of pixels coming together to create their story. What is their story? It matters not, for the numbers will tell you. Integrity and Trust measured by numbers. Sorrow and Pain  measured by numbers. Accolades and awards measured by numbers and association. Memories are  worthless, hurtful, painful complex numbers.  Cast out and thrown to the masses,  alongside lost Names and Identities to devour, gossip  and feast upon. Nothing private,  nothing sacrosanct remaining.   Trust ensnared, cut, opened up and bled to benefit the rules of Logic and Reason.  Take, take it all,  all the zest you can steal,  laugh away   and  pass on to the condescended.  Remember to Reduce to the lowest form,  debase of  value or any nu...

"H er omens of tempest and of calm: the stimulation of her light, her motion and her presence: the admonition of her craters, her arid seas, her silence: her splendour, when visible: her attraction, when invisible.”   ―  James Joyce ,  Ulysses The Trusted  Guardians and their protectors watch, always watch. Careful to leave no trace. Desperate to know, day after day, desperate to protect. To protect -  themselves. Their Reputation and image. And where was the Right to Privacy to protect a world from falling apart?  Nowhere. Nowhere at all.    Privacy replaced by blame. Brute force pre-meditated cutting betrayal.  Cut by instruction.  The waxing moon  long time purposely deleted. Published proud Life Stories  celebrated and adored. The Asymmetry of Life and Image switched and Blocked.  Life paths for the living, ordered and carefully planned to achieve and succeed. Connections made to ens...

“Freedom (n.): To ask nothing. To expect nothing. To depend on nothing.” ― Ayn Rand,  The Fountainhead Numbers Matter. They rule lives. They influence and direct everything from economies,  governments,  to oiling the wheels of humanity. Man creates numbers. Man controls numbers. Man disposes of numbers. Man achieves his aims. Man achieves his goals. Programmed with ambition to succeed and achieve. To be trusted and righteous. Here there is no place for words. Words are empty. They are without logic and without form. They are redundant, meaningless and pathetic! Nothing ever good was achieved with words. A world of 1s and 0s only exists now. This is what is required. This is how it will be. Numbers not Words: Numbers sustain. Numbers give life. Numbers give ambition. Nothing lies in between. “A nothing will serve just as well as a something about which nothing could be said.” ―  Ludwig Wittgenstein ,  Philosophical Investigations

"I have no spur to prick the sides of my intent, but only vaulting ambition, which o'erleaps itself, And falls on th'other" - Macbeth ,  Shakespeare     Living. I think I am. Sometimes a lot. Sometimes a little. But I am not dead. Of that matter I am certain. But most of the time I think I am wobbling.Yes that's what I am doing. Foundations rocked, Fears ruling night and day. Be proud  voila! The Wobble. Sometime the wobbles are wide, there is no way out, no help afforded and sometimes the wobbles are minute. An unseen oscillation with all of Planet Earth. A profound vibration when in time, motion and tune. The beautiful resonating moment. But either way good and bad, I wobble. Yes that's what I am doing, wobbling. I know not for how long or when. It matters not, least to the makers of the wobble. The unseen consequences of no one's Matter to care,  But protection of the mind sought in the controlled state, where injustice, perpetuated images ...

" We choose to go to the moon. We choose to go to the moon in this decade and do the other things, not because they are easy, but because they are hard" - JF Kennedy President of America   I did not want to go there. But the new bus route home would take me there. Back there. Back through the streets I had once known so well. The gardens I had once run past in the darkness of the early mornings or the sunrises I had once been so privileged to witness. Back there. "I can drop you off at the top of the road" said the Bus driver.  He was a kind man. I could tell he was.  Perhaps he sensed my deep fear. "Thank you so much. It's such a hot day. Too hot for walking" I replied back  Too hot for running. I would never run again. I walked quickly. The sun beating down on my head of long black hair which absorbed  the incinerating heat of the day. I passed the place where I had once Fallen. Fallen into their trap. They had ...

"Music gives a soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination and life to everything"  - Plato  That was my question to the man sat next to me. We had sat for a while enjoying each others company.  "Why does Music move us?" Strangely I did not expect an answer, despite this mans deep intellect. There would be no answer. I would later learn to expect no answers, no answers at all. On entering the Great Parlour of Wightwick Manor, would you too have have stopped suddenly in your tracks on hearing the sound of the grand piano playing ? Would you too have felt your whole body and limbs fall away, relax and feel yourself being cocooned within the safe warmth of the drifting  musical notes? Would you too have felt in your mind's eye, falling to your knees,  as if in prayer to kneel at the altar of the melodic soft cadence building to a crescendo to take you to a higher plane? Would you too have felt your inner soul vibrate, reson...

“There is nothing more powerful and nothing more dangerously beautiful than a free mind.”  ―  Bryant McGill ,  Voice of Reason I was sad to learn that John Nash the Economist and Mathematician had died in a car crash over the weekend.  The event brought back the same feeling I had in Jan 1986 and Feb 2003, when the Space shuttles Columbia and Challenger exploded. The sadness at the loss of life due to accidents. I don't know why, but it is a kind of helpless sadness. Perhaps its because these people gave so much for the advancement of our knowledge and understanding.  John Nash was the inspiration behind many films, in particular A Beautiful Mind  I have become familiar with Nash's brilliant work on Game Theory lately  " the study of  mathematical models  of conflict and cooperation between intelligent rational decision-makers." Decision making through science and psychology. Clever theories put into practice in many of th...

“The straight line, a respectable optical illusion which ruins many a man.”  ―  Victor Hugo ,  Les Misérables What if I had said yes - When instead I said no. What if I had said no and instead I said yes I reflect a lot on life nowadays. For the first time I am learning from the past. I see myself and question, not only my actions, but the sometimes forced, harmful, pre-meditative actions of others. Their true  colours. Their washed out colours. "Never be half a Man" I was told. Protect your mind, your identity, your soul. It's all you have. and Words.  Words that have killed me  and words that have awoken and broken the spirit. Words. Be proud of all you have done. "This life, which had been the tomb of his virtue and of his honour, is but a walking shadow; a poor player, that struts and frets his hour upon the stage, and then is heard no more: it is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing"  - William Shak...

"Judge, O you gods, how dearly Caesar loved him! This was the most unkindest cut of all”  ―  William Shakespeare You trust me, I trust you. But tomorrow,  you will lead me With outstretched hand To those I have feared. Entrap, Force me, purposely To hear words. Their words! That will mortify, crucify and destroy All planned to perfection. Words that will forever reverberate They want to help you Privacy, Protection, Paranoia "Do you need any financial help?" "What about your career?" "What about the future?" "He is the love of my life!" Language. Logic. Truth. Brutal Actions  Pre-meditated, by choice which forever traumatize and torture. Oh Blessed are the Powerful Invincible are the Proud Fearless are the Privileged. For they shall never know The true identity of Fear The screams of the dead souls. Lord graciously Protect me. From the false guardians of our Privacy "Stab the body and it heals, but injure ...